Teenagers - Love to Hate them or Hate to Love them?

I know that there is some sort of disconnect in a teenagers mind. Most all of us went through that same stage. But I just don't remember being a complete IDIOT!!!! Granted, being the oldest probably had something to do with maturing early, as did being a female. And my sons' up-bringing in a country of idiots (no, I am NOT exaggerating!) has a lot to do with their current state of mind, along with being boys in general (no offense intended to the men out there.)

So my question is this: How do I continue to keep sane? I am at the point of throwing up my hands and being done with them. On the other hand, as a mom I can't quit on my kids. I know myself enough to know that if I did quit, I would guilt-trip myself forever. So how do I continue and still keep my mind?

I will always love them (I tell this to them all the time) even if they do something horrible. I will love THEM, just hate what they DO. Like right now, I love them so much I can't quit trying. But it is making me not want to be around them, talk to them, do anything for them, etc. Yet, I keep pushing them to do better, be better, want better. Because of where they come from, they are satisfied with the statusquo. Whatever life hands them is fine. We have tried to explain to them that here in America you can have and be whatever you dream of if you work hard enough for it. They just don't care.

How do I keep caring to help someone who doesn't care if they are helped? And worse yet, scoffs at any help they are given? I so want to get off this ride.....parenting, that is.